Shock as people apparently still watching cricket

March 27, 2018

Sports fans across the world were shocked as it was revealed people are still watching cricket.

 

The news comes after Australian cricketer Cameron Bancroft was caught on camera 'ball-tampering', which at first sounded intriguing but unfortunately turned out to be just another boring cricket term involving tape, a cricket ball and some dirt.

 

But more shocking than the sight of a man with his hands down his pants and scuffing his ball with a makeshift form of sandpaper was the revelation that people are still tuning in to watch a sport where one match can last up to five days without a single moment of excitement.

 

We spoke with three cricket fans and asked them what keeps them watching the sport. Simon Rogers, 62 and a lifelong cricket fan, who had this to say:

 

"I can't watch sports that are too exciting because of the angina, so cricket's just perfect for me. It's either that or golf, and I'm not f***ing watching golf."

 

Clinton Smith, a 37-year-old accountant from Bradford, explained what he finds so fascinating about the sport:

 

"You just never know what's going to happen. Is the bowler going to spin it to the right, left, or not at all?! Are the fielders going to move? Sometimes, I can't keep up!"

 

Chris Ramsbottom, 31, another avid cricket fan (albeit for very different reasons), said:

 

"I love cricket. Well, I don't really pay much attention to the matches; they're boring as f***, but cricket grounds are a great place to get absolutely blitzed.

 

"I've been going to watch both England and my local team, Gloucestershire County Cricket Club, for years, and I don't remember a single match, even the few where I was sober."

 

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